I really don’t have much to talk about today…

I am heavy with mood, and quite frankly, restless.  There are things missing in my life, and I don’t know how to get them.  I’d like to say that I am happy right now, and I have good reason to be happy, but I’m in one of those “nothing’s ever good enough” modes.

I want to disappear.  Fake my death and head off to the South of France and become a furniture mover.  I have no problem living my life in obscurity as long as the scenery is nice.  People used to just be able to disappear, start over, and live out their days in serenity.  I’d like that. 

But then my ego and thirst for power and recognition would never allow me to lead that simple life in absentia that I so long for.  No, I am a machine that was built for different things, even if the result is a crash and burn.

There has to be a reason for all of it, or none of it matters…


6 responses

  1. I suppose I just don’t understand…

    October 13, 2004 at 12:03 pm

  2. Which is pretty interesting, since you said an hour ago that you weren’t too shabby.  Glad to know I’m not only feeling better, but that you’re doing stunningly fabulous in Indiana…

    October 13, 2004 at 12:20 pm

  3. I’m so with you on this.  Cheer up, sweetpea, there has to be a light at the end, you know?

    October 13, 2004 at 1:09 pm

  4. I feel ya. You can’t let it get to you though, you just have to keep on moving along.

    October 13, 2004 at 4:06 pm

  5. You assflag.

    October 14, 2004 at 1:55 am

  6. Anonymous

    You’re ignoring me and I’m not sure why? hmm …
    Well, if you decide to move to the South of France – TAKE ME WITH YOU!

    October 14, 2004 at 11:28 pm

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